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Dispatches from an accidentally-unplugged weekend.

It was a good weekend, friends.

Saturday morning I made refrigerator pickles and zucchini bread. It was necessary, to use up the bounty in the fridge generously donated by gardener friends overwhelmed by their harvests. If I’d been able to put it off indefinitely, the way I seem to be able to with projects that don’t involve perishable produce, I may never have gotten around to it. But impending decay creates a pretty immovable deadline.

Saturday evening included dinner out with my brother and his wife. Sunday morning Eric and I cleaned the AirBnB for guests who would be arriving Sunday afternoon, went to the farm stand to replace some of the used-up produce with new perishables to make projects out of. Finally we relaxed in front of Cool Hand Luke, a favorite of Eric’s that I’ve never seen. True to form for the 40something version of myself, I only made it 90 minutes into the movie before I tapped out, with promises to pick it up again later. (It’s not going to end well for Luke, is it?)

It was a lovely, slow, yet productive weekend, and when I cracked open my laptop this morning I realized it had been the first time I’d used it since printing a recipe early Saturday. My phone went similarly unused, spending most of the weekend plugged in or at the bottom of my purse. I hadn’t planned a digital detox; unplugging just sort of happened when I was busy doing other things in my real world.

It reminded me of a truth I always know, but that can sometimes feel elusive in the moment: I’m most content - and least likely to turn to unhealthy distractions - when I’m pleasurably productive. But it works best when I start by doing real, in-person things I love and then letting the rest fall away, rather than the other way around.

In other words, if I’d started the weekend by making a proclamation - I’m going to stay off my phone and computer this weekend! - but didn’t have other things lined up to do with my hands and attention, I’m not so sure that declaration would have stuck.

That’s not to say that going overboard with busy-ness is the answer, either. Overwhelm can just as easily lead to checking out via consumption and I’ve been there many times. But I find that I tend to get most overwhelmed when I feel like there are endless things I could be doing, and ironically, social media scrolling just feeds that feeling.

The best antidote to both boredom and overwhelm, I’ve found, is just to choose one worthwhile thing, jump in, and do it.

In my private community, we had an August screen time/social media challenge that centered around creating and sticking to limits, and I’m here to admit that my personal challenge was an epic failure. If anything, I was on Instagram MORE in August than I had been in July. There are several reasons for this, but mainly I think it’s because I didn’t proactively give myself anything else to fill the time with.

I started with a negative (less scrolling!) rather than a positive (more long walks!) And I don’t know about you, but for me, a void is not a very compelling goal.

Starting tomorrow The Tea Circle is kicking off a family meal-planning challenge and I can’t wait to get started. Why? Because it’s centered around doing stuff. Meal planning and cooking are ultimately creative pursuits, which is exactly what’s needed, I think, when you’re trying to break the cycle of mindless consumption.

When your hands are busy writing shopping lists and chopping veggies, they can’t also be busy scrolling.

I wouldn’t be at all surprised if, at the end of September, it turns out a “digital detox” has naturally occurred for all of us who go through the challenge. I’m pretty much positive that my on-screen time will be way down, and that the time I spend online will be more focused and enjoyable.

Because for me, the best way to reduce a habit I want less of in my life is to spend more time and attention doing something I care about. How about you?