I still have a jar of rubber bands, and the jar is one of the decorative glass jars the Boy Scouts sold popcorn in in the 1970s. We've definitely returned to some of our money-saving habits; some we never stopped after living through pretty lean times in the 80s.
Wow, this takes me back! My friend’s parents’ toilet reads were this and Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader. They every book in both series stacked up in the main bathrooms.
...Not to mention so much of this is just good for the environment. Of course, "convenience" has harmed earth drastically. And, now I have a better way to organize my rubber bands in my utensil drawer. Of course I reuse them....I remember that publication. I'll check it out at the library, too.
Such a great food for thought in this piece, Meagan. For the last eleven years I stayed home with my kids, and it often felt like I deserved a tangible "reward" for that hard work, which was so often unseen or almost immediately undone. I'd buy things in small dribs and drabs--a low quality shirt from TJMaxx here, an $8 lipstick there--in an attempt to string out that high of making a purchase, coupled with the feeling that I was getting away with something in the process. If that lipstick was buried in my typical weekly Walmart order, no one was the wiser. But in both rehabbing my relationship with money and in working with a great financial planner, I've come to understand that in our single income household, the $15-20 things really add up over time, and I'd rather invest that money in things that provide long-term value, like family vacations in our camper or writing classes for me. Starting to see the opportunity cost of those small outputs has really shifted my mindset and helped me get excited for funneling that money into more personally valuable things. Drastically cutting down on my Amazon purchases has helped with that too because I have to work a lot harder to go out and get the high I'm seeking.
YES to drastically cutting down on Amazon purchases, and also, just *slowing down* enough that we are even able register the dopamine dings when they come. When I was in "full speed ahead" living, I think I was just jumping from one dopamine hit to another, not even able to absorb one before needing another "fix." Not to mention, literally losing track of purchases because I didn't have time to pay attention.
"My guess is that to some people it is actually very enjoyable and absolutely worth the money, and that to others, it’s just something they pick up to stay awake or endure the grocery store.
Do you know which category you fall into?"
This sums up my recent thinking about how I spend money and acquire "stuff". And, BTW, my weekly $8 latte from Starbucks ($20 if I choose to treat my son and carpool buddy) and daily $1.35 coffee/espresso from Kwik Trip definitely fall into the former category.
For me, it's being mindful of how and where I spend my money as well as WHY I'm choosing to bring an item into my home. What itch am I trying to scratch? Am I just addicted to the dopamine hit of buying something new - from clicking "complete purchase", monitoring the package tracking, to opening the box that landed on my front porch - or is this item fulfilling a deeper purpose in my life. Not just from a financial perspective, but one of consumption.
My family is fortunate enough to be in a very comfortable financial position which means we can easily justify ridiculous spending because "we can afford it". But the past few years, I've had a nagging in the back of my mind that I'm not living in accordance with my deeper values. My words for 2025 are Contentment and Abundance as I'm focusing on living in the joy of gratitude for what I already have. This doesn't mean I can't every buy anything new, but it involves being much more intentional about spending and consumption.
Some of this is paying very close attention to the packaging of items, like avoiding the Costco chicken taco kit because of the giant non-recyclable (not that it matters anyway, given the state of recycling) plastic container it comes in. I also have always re-used Ziploc bags and aluminum foil, not necessarily out of frugality, but because I'm just that midwestern. (Side Note: While I make bacon in the oven, I simply cannot bring myself to use foil that I throw out after only one use!)
Another part is divesting myself from Amazon which is leading to interesting purchasing decisions. There may be products I decide to no longer use if I can only acquire them through the Big A, or if I can't bring myself to pay the prices of other retailers. I'm THRILLED to see Bookshop.org now has ebooks so that makes the process easier.
Honestly, my first thought was "who raised you that you needed to be told this basic household management strategy". Because I'm snarky that way. But it also got me wondering if there are entire generations of people, or social classes, who HAVEN'T been taught to view food waste as a bad thing or to be mindful of what gets chucked in the trash. I'm not saying I'm perfect, far from it, but I feel like I'm much more aware of living a lifestyle of significant privilege compared to my early childhood and how my parents grew up.
We're incredibly spoiled in this country. While we're incredibly fortunate not to have experienced something as catastrophic as The Great Depression or WWII, we certainly can stand to take a step back and re-evaluate the standard of living we take for granted.
Wow, that was long!!! I had to break it into two comments!
I am making a big attempt to break up with Amazon (cancelled Prime and everything - and I did NOT know that you can buy ebooks through Bookshop.org, but that's a game-changer for me!) Anyway, when I read this sentence: "Am I just addicted to the dopamine hit of buying something new - from clicking "complete purchase", monitoring the package tracking, to opening the box that landed on my front porch - or is this item fulfilling a deeper purpose in my life"....I thought about what that journey feels like for me, and honestly, I think the dopamine ends after I put the thing in my cart. Half the time when it arrives, my initial feeling is panic that I now have yet another box to deal with.
I think we live in fatalistic times. No amount of frugality is going to help you buy a house if your entire neighborhood is being bought out by investors with cash offers. I'm not saying frugality doesn't matter but there is more going on here than personal choice.
Well...but that feels like a pretty fatalistic point of view to me? Of course there's more going on than personal choice, no arguments there. And frugality may not help a person buy a house in a variety of situations, but then again, having a little pile of cash may offer options they otherwise wouldn't have had. It's not about fatalism to me, it's about the fact that things happen, and the part of life I do have some semblance of control over is where I'm interested in focusing my energy.
My weakness is going out to eat. I love the experience of it, and, in the past, have loved the food served to me. More recently, though, my husband and I have discovered that so much food we eat out is mediocre, as you said, with a few exceptions. So why were we still doing it so often?? This past year we cut way back on going out to eat for various health reasons, and while I occasionally miss the experience of being at a restaurant, I don't miss the food at all. Everything we cook at home tastes so much better than what we find in most restaurants. Even when it's leftovers. Interestingly, I also find i don't crave certain restaurant meals like I used to. Particularly Chinese. It's like I conquered an addiction, and I really like the feeling of not being a slave to my food desires anymore. And,the TONS of money that we save by cooking at home doesn't suck, either. It's really, really awesome. Now, I'm happy to save going out for places we really love or for food we don't/can't easily make at home ourselves (like sushi). I look forward to the experience more, I feel less guilty about doing it, and I love having extra money to spend on high quality cooking ingredients, or nice candles, or a new book here and there.
I hear ALL of this. First of all, I used to actually love the experience of going out to eat, but at some point I think I realized I mostly love the MEMORY of the experience of going out to eat, lol. I feel like, since the pandemic, the quality of the food (often) and the service (almost always) has gone down, down, down, while the costs have steadily risen. I know restaurant owners are facing so many challenges these days and I hung in there for a long time, wanting to support them. But I just can't justify the prices of 90% of my restaurant experiences anymore (and in many cases it sort of doesn't even seem like anyone is trying to make it better...which is a big pet peeve of mine.) There are a couple places I'll still happily go and I try to give them more of my dollars, but just go out less often overall. And you're right, once you reframe the mindset, you really stop missing it.
I sadly agree. Apart from a few mom-and-pop restaurants I love and am loyal to, most of the restaurants I've gone to over the past few years are overpriced and underwhelming. And don't even get me started on the nonsense that is chain restaurant menu options! 🤮 They may be cheaper, but there's a reason for that, lol.
Oh my gosh, I didn’t know you were a Tightwad Gazette lady. I was SO into that book in early marriage also!
Used to make homemade Wheat Thins and have a price notebook. And so many other of her tips.
After a big hiatus (working 40-50 hrs a week and having four kids necessitates and affords a lot of more expensive shortcuts), I’m back to “living smaller” and cheaper and loving it.
Oh, the homemade Wheat Thins! Now THAT is next-level. (But totally worth trying...)
Totally hear you on the multitude of expenses with a house full of small kids. It's really hard to be "middling" about anything in that stage; it's like you have to go ALL IN on earning/buying or ALL IN on making/scrimping. It's kind of great to be on the other side, isn't it?
So great!! Half my children moved out last month. I’ve been inspired following your journey of walking toward the “empty nest”. It’s a little sad, but mostly so fun to try new things and watch them (mostly) flourish!
I'd LOVE to homestead, raise my own chickens and grow my own fruits and vegetables. But I live in the city, in a condo. The best I could do is grow herbs and MAYBE tomatoes!! I don't really drive, so commuting would be a factor living in a more rural area. I'd be really isolated.
Hmm, I definitely don't think rural living is a requirement for frugal living, and I don't even think I gave any examples of homesteading activities in the above - so it's interesting that that's what you took away from this post. I would argue that anyone, no matter where they live, has plenty of opportunity to repair, make do, do without, etc. It's skills and time that seem to be scarce, not property.
Probably just a vibe. I DO make my own bread, but it's mostly for my own consumption. My son is okay with my stuff but my husband hates it. He thinks it's "too clean." I typically bake an ancient grain, high fibre (i.e. psyllium and flax) soda/quick bread using baking soda and kefir.
Ha! Yes, all of those could be obstacles. I feel like "homesteading" is one of those words that is defined wildly differently depending who you ask. I have a small container garden and six hens out of which I get approximately four eggs per day. This does not make me a homesteader in my mind...more of a backyard chicken owner with a very big backyard. If I were truly a homesteader I'd be figuring out how to maximize our acreage to yield a lot more food, and I'm not really thinking that way right now. Still, it IS satisfying to collect those eggs, and to tend a little garden, and to bake bread, and all of that. So maybe it just doesn't matter what it's called.
I love this perspective so much.
I still have a jar of rubber bands, and the jar is one of the decorative glass jars the Boy Scouts sold popcorn in in the 1970s. We've definitely returned to some of our money-saving habits; some we never stopped after living through pretty lean times in the 80s.
i bet those popcorn jars are cool…
They are, and they're also useful. I'll share a photo of the two I have to Notes.
I loved this. 🩵
Wow, this takes me back! My friend’s parents’ toilet reads were this and Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader. They every book in both series stacked up in the main bathrooms.
YES! I’d forgotten those :)
I forgot about "The Bathroom Reader!" I loved those, had several volumes.
...Not to mention so much of this is just good for the environment. Of course, "convenience" has harmed earth drastically. And, now I have a better way to organize my rubber bands in my utensil drawer. Of course I reuse them....I remember that publication. I'll check it out at the library, too.
I keep wondering what new convenience “they” can possibly invent at this point? Hasn’t all The convenience already been convenience-d? Probably not.
Such a great food for thought in this piece, Meagan. For the last eleven years I stayed home with my kids, and it often felt like I deserved a tangible "reward" for that hard work, which was so often unseen or almost immediately undone. I'd buy things in small dribs and drabs--a low quality shirt from TJMaxx here, an $8 lipstick there--in an attempt to string out that high of making a purchase, coupled with the feeling that I was getting away with something in the process. If that lipstick was buried in my typical weekly Walmart order, no one was the wiser. But in both rehabbing my relationship with money and in working with a great financial planner, I've come to understand that in our single income household, the $15-20 things really add up over time, and I'd rather invest that money in things that provide long-term value, like family vacations in our camper or writing classes for me. Starting to see the opportunity cost of those small outputs has really shifted my mindset and helped me get excited for funneling that money into more personally valuable things. Drastically cutting down on my Amazon purchases has helped with that too because I have to work a lot harder to go out and get the high I'm seeking.
YES to drastically cutting down on Amazon purchases, and also, just *slowing down* enough that we are even able register the dopamine dings when they come. When I was in "full speed ahead" living, I think I was just jumping from one dopamine hit to another, not even able to absorb one before needing another "fix." Not to mention, literally losing track of purchases because I didn't have time to pay attention.
"My guess is that to some people it is actually very enjoyable and absolutely worth the money, and that to others, it’s just something they pick up to stay awake or endure the grocery store.
Do you know which category you fall into?"
This sums up my recent thinking about how I spend money and acquire "stuff". And, BTW, my weekly $8 latte from Starbucks ($20 if I choose to treat my son and carpool buddy) and daily $1.35 coffee/espresso from Kwik Trip definitely fall into the former category.
For me, it's being mindful of how and where I spend my money as well as WHY I'm choosing to bring an item into my home. What itch am I trying to scratch? Am I just addicted to the dopamine hit of buying something new - from clicking "complete purchase", monitoring the package tracking, to opening the box that landed on my front porch - or is this item fulfilling a deeper purpose in my life. Not just from a financial perspective, but one of consumption.
My family is fortunate enough to be in a very comfortable financial position which means we can easily justify ridiculous spending because "we can afford it". But the past few years, I've had a nagging in the back of my mind that I'm not living in accordance with my deeper values. My words for 2025 are Contentment and Abundance as I'm focusing on living in the joy of gratitude for what I already have. This doesn't mean I can't every buy anything new, but it involves being much more intentional about spending and consumption.
Some of this is paying very close attention to the packaging of items, like avoiding the Costco chicken taco kit because of the giant non-recyclable (not that it matters anyway, given the state of recycling) plastic container it comes in. I also have always re-used Ziploc bags and aluminum foil, not necessarily out of frugality, but because I'm just that midwestern. (Side Note: While I make bacon in the oven, I simply cannot bring myself to use foil that I throw out after only one use!)
Another part is divesting myself from Amazon which is leading to interesting purchasing decisions. There may be products I decide to no longer use if I can only acquire them through the Big A, or if I can't bring myself to pay the prices of other retailers. I'm THRILLED to see Bookshop.org now has ebooks so that makes the process easier.
Last fall I stumbled across this article:
https://www.apartmenttherapy.com/mottainai-meaning-japanese-concept-37422443
Honestly, my first thought was "who raised you that you needed to be told this basic household management strategy". Because I'm snarky that way. But it also got me wondering if there are entire generations of people, or social classes, who HAVEN'T been taught to view food waste as a bad thing or to be mindful of what gets chucked in the trash. I'm not saying I'm perfect, far from it, but I feel like I'm much more aware of living a lifestyle of significant privilege compared to my early childhood and how my parents grew up.
We're incredibly spoiled in this country. While we're incredibly fortunate not to have experienced something as catastrophic as The Great Depression or WWII, we certainly can stand to take a step back and re-evaluate the standard of living we take for granted.
Wow, that was long!!! I had to break it into two comments!
I am making a big attempt to break up with Amazon (cancelled Prime and everything - and I did NOT know that you can buy ebooks through Bookshop.org, but that's a game-changer for me!) Anyway, when I read this sentence: "Am I just addicted to the dopamine hit of buying something new - from clicking "complete purchase", monitoring the package tracking, to opening the box that landed on my front porch - or is this item fulfilling a deeper purpose in my life"....I thought about what that journey feels like for me, and honestly, I think the dopamine ends after I put the thing in my cart. Half the time when it arrives, my initial feeling is panic that I now have yet another box to deal with.
I WISH my coffee only cost $5…but I do make my own bread. Balance?
For sure! Nobody does everything (or doesn’t do everything, as the case may be…)
I think we live in fatalistic times. No amount of frugality is going to help you buy a house if your entire neighborhood is being bought out by investors with cash offers. I'm not saying frugality doesn't matter but there is more going on here than personal choice.
Well...but that feels like a pretty fatalistic point of view to me? Of course there's more going on than personal choice, no arguments there. And frugality may not help a person buy a house in a variety of situations, but then again, having a little pile of cash may offer options they otherwise wouldn't have had. It's not about fatalism to me, it's about the fact that things happen, and the part of life I do have some semblance of control over is where I'm interested in focusing my energy.
My weakness is going out to eat. I love the experience of it, and, in the past, have loved the food served to me. More recently, though, my husband and I have discovered that so much food we eat out is mediocre, as you said, with a few exceptions. So why were we still doing it so often?? This past year we cut way back on going out to eat for various health reasons, and while I occasionally miss the experience of being at a restaurant, I don't miss the food at all. Everything we cook at home tastes so much better than what we find in most restaurants. Even when it's leftovers. Interestingly, I also find i don't crave certain restaurant meals like I used to. Particularly Chinese. It's like I conquered an addiction, and I really like the feeling of not being a slave to my food desires anymore. And,the TONS of money that we save by cooking at home doesn't suck, either. It's really, really awesome. Now, I'm happy to save going out for places we really love or for food we don't/can't easily make at home ourselves (like sushi). I look forward to the experience more, I feel less guilty about doing it, and I love having extra money to spend on high quality cooking ingredients, or nice candles, or a new book here and there.
I hear ALL of this. First of all, I used to actually love the experience of going out to eat, but at some point I think I realized I mostly love the MEMORY of the experience of going out to eat, lol. I feel like, since the pandemic, the quality of the food (often) and the service (almost always) has gone down, down, down, while the costs have steadily risen. I know restaurant owners are facing so many challenges these days and I hung in there for a long time, wanting to support them. But I just can't justify the prices of 90% of my restaurant experiences anymore (and in many cases it sort of doesn't even seem like anyone is trying to make it better...which is a big pet peeve of mine.) There are a couple places I'll still happily go and I try to give them more of my dollars, but just go out less often overall. And you're right, once you reframe the mindset, you really stop missing it.
I sadly agree. Apart from a few mom-and-pop restaurants I love and am loyal to, most of the restaurants I've gone to over the past few years are overpriced and underwhelming. And don't even get me started on the nonsense that is chain restaurant menu options! 🤮 They may be cheaper, but there's a reason for that, lol.
Your writing really speaks to me, you’re so right! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you, Hilda!
Oh my gosh, I didn’t know you were a Tightwad Gazette lady. I was SO into that book in early marriage also!
Used to make homemade Wheat Thins and have a price notebook. And so many other of her tips.
After a big hiatus (working 40-50 hrs a week and having four kids necessitates and affords a lot of more expensive shortcuts), I’m back to “living smaller” and cheaper and loving it.
Oh, the homemade Wheat Thins! Now THAT is next-level. (But totally worth trying...)
Totally hear you on the multitude of expenses with a house full of small kids. It's really hard to be "middling" about anything in that stage; it's like you have to go ALL IN on earning/buying or ALL IN on making/scrimping. It's kind of great to be on the other side, isn't it?
So great!! Half my children moved out last month. I’ve been inspired following your journey of walking toward the “empty nest”. It’s a little sad, but mostly so fun to try new things and watch them (mostly) flourish!
I'd LOVE to homestead, raise my own chickens and grow my own fruits and vegetables. But I live in the city, in a condo. The best I could do is grow herbs and MAYBE tomatoes!! I don't really drive, so commuting would be a factor living in a more rural area. I'd be really isolated.
Hmm, I definitely don't think rural living is a requirement for frugal living, and I don't even think I gave any examples of homesteading activities in the above - so it's interesting that that's what you took away from this post. I would argue that anyone, no matter where they live, has plenty of opportunity to repair, make do, do without, etc. It's skills and time that seem to be scarce, not property.
Probably just a vibe. I DO make my own bread, but it's mostly for my own consumption. My son is okay with my stuff but my husband hates it. He thinks it's "too clean." I typically bake an ancient grain, high fibre (i.e. psyllium and flax) soda/quick bread using baking soda and kefir.
Yum! Your bread sounds delicious!
Thank you!
I used to fantasize about being a homesteader but then I faced reality that I kill houseplants, hate gardening, and am scared of livestock. ;-)
Ha! Yes, all of those could be obstacles. I feel like "homesteading" is one of those words that is defined wildly differently depending who you ask. I have a small container garden and six hens out of which I get approximately four eggs per day. This does not make me a homesteader in my mind...more of a backyard chicken owner with a very big backyard. If I were truly a homesteader I'd be figuring out how to maximize our acreage to yield a lot more food, and I'm not really thinking that way right now. Still, it IS satisfying to collect those eggs, and to tend a little garden, and to bake bread, and all of that. So maybe it just doesn't matter what it's called.